It’s not what you speak but what others hear.

During my 2 year stay in US, unconsciously I had picked certain words / idioms which were often used in the business context to convey things without any ambiguity. I had shared my apartment with my friends /colleagues; we often tend to use the same vocabulary in our home also to communicate. After reaching India, during my initial days I continued using the same business vocabulary, after all man is a creature of his/her habit. Little did I realize I was upsetting my parents especially with my communication style. My parents and other family elders assumed I had a tectonic shift in my attitude. They were really beginning to worry about my lack of respect to elders and customs (certainly not my intention).

Before my US stint I was known among my circle for giving respect to elders and old customs. Meanwhile I was enjoying the warmth, the food of being at home, all the while being ignorant of the fact everyone around me were bit upset. I always have the greatest regard and respect to all the elders and our traditional custom. Parents and friends being people who loves us no matter how we evolve into, all of them made the internal adjustment to accommodate the new ‘me’. No one had a word with me about this regard, since I fitted perfectly like ‘T’ to their exiting theme of ‘US returned Indian’. Back in office however things weren’t that rosy. I couldn’t convey my message nor get the work done with people, who have been working with me for quite a long time. Slowly on a personnel level introspection I was beginning to wonder may be there is something wrong in the way I am saying things, or may be people have grown much beyond I have comprehended. I was determined to dig to the root of this problem.

I had lots of questions revolving in my mind like ‘What could be wrong’… ‘What is the missing gap’..’Is it with me or with others?’ The gap can be with either of the side, but the onus was on me to fix it, since something was certainly broken. But I didn’t know what was broken. Consciously I began to monitor the choice of words I used to converse with my colleagues and friends. Analyzing the cause and effect reaction of my fellow people for the various choice of word I used during conversation, like a scientist prodding over his analytical data, trying to arrive at a generalization. Finally during one of my bike riding session, with the chilly wind thrusting my face backwards, and the beads of sweat getting frozen and forming a salty layer in my face, the eureka moment arrived. It’s not only that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder the meaning of the English words also lies in the ears of the listener. I can hear the tiny voice inside my readers mind asking the question, “How in the hell can the meaning of the English words change from listener to listener?” It can, hold on just a little longer my dear tiny friend.

For most of the non native speakers of English (for that matter any language), every word has a connotation or a mental image associated with it, irrespective of the literal meaning of the word. During any conversation with another human being it’s this connotation or perception about words that tends to channelize our understanding of the spoken word rather than the literal meaning of the words. So it’s easily provides a lot of opportunity for others to misunderstand you especially when we have to communicate with people coming from different backgrounds, culture, age etc.  That it is important to realize “It’s not what you speak, but what others hear”. No one can question the perception of another person because there is no definite way to approve / deny one’s perception. Perceptions are formed based on an individual’s experience or exposure with the outside world. Unless you don’t share a common platform with the listener the chances of you being misunderstood is highly probable. So is there a no way out for this precarious situation. Don’t loose hope. There is a way out. The best way forward while interacting with people with whom you don’t share a common ground / pedigree is to be smart enough to choose very simple words to get our message across. Don’t use any high flying, Ivy League words in short words which requires the common man to reach out to the nearest dictionary or do a quick Google search.

 As a speaker if your vocabulary is quite simple and plain the chances of you getting your message across effectively without any distortion is pretty high.  The onus is on the speaker and not on the listener since the real purpose of communication is to effectively transfer the ideas from one individual to another person. In today’s knowledge world the customer is the king, similarly in the communication universe it’s the listener who is the king and not the speaker. The speaker is relevant only when he/she has listeners not the other way round.

What is manickism?

What is manickism? Ever since i named my blog i have been asked this question a lot many times. Is it communism? or Socialism? or Capitalism? or is it Sufism? Doesnt it sound bit outdated? Am i following / subscribing to any particular '-ism'? So let me try to put down in words what exactly i feel when i say manickism, it more of an extension or still better a framework through which i understand and assimilate the day today happenings.Its an assimilation of my inner framework + external events, thats why the tag line of my blog say "Orgasm of my thoughts".

So what exactly is 'manickism'? First thing first its a way of life and the way i understand life at this moment. May be some time down the line i am might refine / reject this concept all together, because thats what i am. Always with an open mind to accept new ideas whenever presented with a new facet of information.

Manickism is nothing but oneness / Wholeness. In this 'ism' there is no concept of 'other', Manickism is the I (the bigger I) i consider every living, non living thing as a manisfestation of the same life. There is no place for ego  here.There is no difference between you and me since we both belong to the same seed of life. We may have physically manifested ourselves in two different bodies but in the real sense we all originated from the same pool of life. If you still dont get it, go watch the movie Avatar. The movie is nothing but a grandoise picturization of what i am trying to describe here. It may be totally confusing some of my readers here, but dont worry. It takes some amount of maturity to understand whatever i am saying here. In the meantime you can dismiss this idea or thought i dont mind. After all we all are part of the same life. Whatever i am saying is not something new, its an age old concept. All the ancient books have talked a lot about this. Its just that in the modern rat race we have truly forgotten our roots.

Love you all. God bless universe.

Trouble Down under

The months of December, January and early February are the most pleasant months if you happen to live in Chennai, a place known for its hot & humid weather. The early mornings are pleasant with the birds chirping and the air is fresh ’n’ chill. Come march you would start perspiring the moment you wake up. Living in a hot & humid place and being a hairy person is a practical joke by the Almighty. After completing the morning rituals, most Chennaites will be picking up their copy of “The Hindu” newspaper and enjoying a cup of early morning drink, sitting besides the window.

Of late it deeply disturbs me whenever I read that Indians are being attacked in Australia (the land down under). Initially I hoped and prayed it should be one off incident but alas my hope was shattered into pieces when this little news kept repeating itself, before anyone could realize it turned into a political tornado. True to its nature, the Indian media started serving sensational news item by the day. At one point of time I am sure many followers of English news would have known the Australian geography better than their own neighborhood. The ugly racism card was being repeatedly played and unfortunately the Indian public started to accept the media’s verdict without any questions asked. Until our honorable External Affairs minister called for some sense of sanity and little more responsiveness from the Indian media. The Indian attack rhetoric was played down little once the Home ministry & External ministry started saying their opinion. Meanwhile yours truly was wondering what is that it’s really happening in the land of Kangaroo’s. I always believe in every story has two sides and unfortunately we are not able to go beyond the obvious.  Here is what is really happening in down under and why this might just be the precedent for more clashes like this in the other parts of the world, unless all the stakeholders doesn’t perform due diligence. I sincerely hope & pray I am proved wrong by my fellow human beings.

With the world relenting under severe economic depression the jobs are vanishing in thin air. Suddenly people are losing their opportunity for having a decent life. On the other hand the Indian community is truly opening up thanks to economic liberalization in 1990, Indians have started traveling to faraway places in pursuit of a foreign education and life. Because if ain’t studied aboard you are lost in the Indian rat race. Every free man certainly has the right to choose his / her choice of education. But in the madness the non – metro or ‘Bharat’ (a ‘India’ within India) because of their ignorance often fall trap to the lucrative/enticing offers made by foreign universities. We can’t blame these universities also, since their native population is ageing they naturally want to expose themselves to the student community which is quite in abundance in India.  The Indian parents in their eagerness to provide the best possible education often oversee the fact about the true worthiness of certain college degrees. For them a foreign education is more prestigious than a Indian education not necessarily the better one. 85% of the Indian students take education loans, these loan amounts cover the cost of education and book. With  no one to watch their back and freed from inner moral restrictions most of the Indian students have a blast and start enjoying their academic stay.  In order to earn for their daily livelihood they often end up taking part time jobs as store cashier, gas station person, Indian restaurants working well into late night hours where the hourly billing rate is high since not many native people opt for these timings. No place on earth is safe when you roam around the streets during the owl hooting hours (1am – 3am) there by exposing themselves to all the societal nonsense and robbery attacks. 

If we really want to avoid such happenings in the future, the Indian parents and students should exercise a little more caution & restraint in choosing a foreign university, ensure whether it’s the best course and there is no such quality courses offered in India. Make sure you don’t return from part time jobs during ‘owl hooting’ hours and even if you happen to return please ensure you come together as a group of people.

Now this volatile issue has the characteristics to be repeated across the globe unless all the stakeholders perform due diligence in their respective areas. And the Indian media should  reports news events as it is rather than garnishing with their own seasonings. God bless humanity.

Expectation ?

When a man / woman can accept the fact that nature doesn't change its characteristics for any living or non living thing on this planet, why cant they have the same understanding when it comes to fellow human beings? Why does an individual expect his / her friend to change the characteristics for the sake others expectation.  Why cant we celebrate differences of opinion and yet have a tranquil relationship.Slowly we want to create clones of each of us.